. Judgement Day By: "I AM THE LAW!" Rindimo Cheetah "Order! Order!" Shouted the little meercat dressed as a law officer. "Will this court come to order!?" "Sure!" Shouted another meerkat, "I'll have the ham and cheese sandwich on rye!" "I'll have the Grub Salad!" Shouted yet another meerkat in the assembled jury. The Guard sighed a pitious sigh. "WIll the jury please stand?" The jury stood up. "His honorable Judge Rindimo presiding, I now call case #813453978242093842908430482818-75134289157-1123434A to order! You may be seated." The jury sat down, and began chanting, "Rin-di! Rin-di! Rin-di!" WIthout further ado, the honorable Rindimo Cheetah walked in wearing a black robe, black shoes, and black shades. "I love black," he commented as he climbed up to the podium awaiting him. "Okie-dokie. What's on today's agenda?" "Your honor--" began a lawyer by the name of Shenzi... "GUILTY!!!!!" Shouted Rindimo as he beat the gavel on his desk. "WHAT!? We haven't even started yet!!" "Oh. Sorry... hee hee... It's a reflex. Do carry on!" "Thanks. As I was about to say..." "ANd hurry it up, will ya!? I got a date with Tracie tonight!" "Your Honor, I'm here to prove that Scar is indeed innocent, and it's not his fault that all this happened. It was his parent's never letting him get enough violent video games to curb his homocidal tendencies." "Gee, that's too bad..." "Jyour Honor!" Rindimo turned to see Rafiki in a three piece suit, holding a breifcase. "I eentend to prove dat Seemba ees eenocent! Eet was Scar who ees dee murderer!" "Oh?" "Yes!" "Nah..." "Yes!" "Yes?" "Dat's what I said!!" "Nah..." Rindimo smiled as Rafiki's blue face started to turn red. He always wondered when that enlarging vein across his forehead was going explode. "Okay," the cheetah started, "Let's see what Scar's lawyer has to say about this first." "WHAT!!?" Rafiki stammered, "I thought eet was the defendant dat went first!?" "Hey, ain't it time for a change?" Rindimo dryly replied. "Yes, your honor," Shenzi began, "Scar didn't kill Mufasa-- those ravenous wildebeests did!" "Wildebeest.... MMmm... How do you spell that, anyway?" "What?" "Nevermind. As you were saying?" "I was saying that the wildebeest killed Mufasa, and Scar was just an innocent bystander." "Oh, okay. All right, Rafreaky, what do you have to say?" "Don't call me dat! Seemba is eennocent of hurling Scar off uv Pride Rock! Eet was een self defence!" "OBJECTION, YOUR HONOR!" Shouted Shenzi. "WHERE?? WHERE!!???" Rindimo quickly took off his sunglasses, and looked around bewildered. "Simba is guilty of Scar's 'incident', because he just stood there, and did nothing!" "Honestly?" "Yes." "Hrm... well... what do Simba and Scar have to say about all this?" "Ken I call Seemba to dee stand?" Rafiki inquired. "I don't know.... Can you?" Rindimo retorted. "Sure, why not?" Simba walked up to the meerkat guard, who held a tiny bible for him to place his paw on. "Do you swear?" the Guard began to say. "I do." Simba answered. "Well you shouldn't," Rindimo commented, "It's not nice!" Simba then took his place next to the podium to be interrogated by both lawyers. "Now den," Rafiki began, "Tell dem what happened." "Well," Simba began, "When I first started, I was a little squeamish. I mean, after all, it was my first time-- you know-- doing what I did. I didn't know how to exactly go about it, but I wasn't exactly thinking rationally. I mean, I had other things on my mind... Everything was happening too fast for me... After the chase, and the tumbling, I just gave up, and went with my instincts. It was worth it!" "SO!" Shenzi interjected, "You premeditated! Premedatated, and caried it out! But Why? WHY??" "Isn't it obvious?" Simba looked rather perplexed. "Nala's HOT!" "Heh... I know..." Rindimo whisperred under his breath. "Well, let's hear Scar's side of the story." Scar was lead to the meerkat, and placed his paw on the Bible. "Do you swear?" "Occasionally." Scar was led to the seat, and yet again, the two paralegals began questioning the subject. "Okay, sweetykins," Shenzi began, "Tell me what that BIG, BAD Simba did to wittle you!" "It's not fair!" Scar began, "I never got to be first in anything! I was always the last one picked on a team when we played games. I never even got to be first Mate, ever! It was always Mufasa! And when I finally get somewhere in life, this little twerp comes along, and throws me off a cliff!" "LIAR!" SImba shouted, as he jumped from his seat, and began to pummel Scar, "You made me! You killed my dad!" Suddenly, the bouncers wearing "The Rindimo Cheetah Law Show" T-shirts sprang onto the scene with their tasers, and separated the two. "Fight! Fight! Fight!" Chanted the jury. When all the commotion finally died down, Rafiki smiled, and quietly replied, "No comment, jyour honor." "Okay," Rindimo announced, "This is getting too long. Let's see what's the verdict..." Rindimo opened a white envelope. "ANd the winner is-- Both of them!" "WHAT!?!?!?" Everyone shouted in surprise. "Yeah. They're all GUILTY!!! HA HA HA HA!!!!" The crowd cheered as the two were dragged off kicking, screaming, and cursing all the way. They really DID Swear! "In my closing thoughts," Rindimo said with a tone of thoughtfullness, "Nala really is HOT. Zira too. Period. Okay, Goodnight every body!" The End. -- -Rindimo Cheetah (rindimo@bellsouth.net) +Founder, and only member of L.O.S.T.-- C.A.U.S.E (League Of Simplistic Technology-- Creating All Unforeseen Solutions Evident) +FCOS Lost & Found Clerk ICQ # : 12915153 +Amateur Artist/Writer/Musician AOL IM : Rindimo1 +Bachelor ? <=7 Webpage: http://www.lionking.org/~rindimo/index.shtml + Honorable Member of the Pride Keepers. "One thing nothing can destroy, is our pride deep inside we are one!" ********************************************************************* Well don't stop. Whatever you do, don't stop. Because as soon as you stop, you're forgotten. - Mageuzi *********************************************************************