I don't want to watch you die

To the Editor,

Let me start by acknowledging that Hendrik van der Breggen is partly correct. The life expectancy of gay men (on average) is lower than the life expectancy of other Canadians, primarily due to a higher rate of HIV infection. This fact is so obvious that even Mr. van der Breggen, who seems to get all his information about gay health issues by reading anti-gay diatribes, was unable to miss it.

Like me, Mr. van der Breggen is unhappy about this situation. Or maybe he's just unhappy that we die in a way that costs him money. (He's definitely unhappy about something!)

What should gay men do about our reduced life expectancy? We could all become ex-gays (and then, given the notoriously high relapse rate, become ex-ex-gays). Or we could learn how to be both gay and healthy.

Contrary to what Mr. van der Breggen seems to think, gay sexuality does not consist solely of sticking things up your bum. Men can give each other sexual pleasure in many ways, limited only by the laws of physics and human imagination. These range from completely safe (telephone sex) to very dangerous (anal intercourse without a condom).

Because of education efforts within the gay community (often opposed by the likes of Mr. van der Breggen on "moral" grounds), unsafe sex has become much less common. Unfortunately, young men who sometimes have sex with other men (whether or not they think of themselves as gay) continue to have unsafe sex and get infected at an appalling rate. Men the same age as the average Imprint reader.

It's really to these men that this letter is addressed. You don't want to die, I don't want to watch you die, and Mr. van der Breggen doesn't want to pay for it. Do us all a favour and learn how to protect yourself. If you want anonymous information or just someone to talk to, call one of the phone lines.

Or come out to the next Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo meeting. There you'll find a diverse group of people (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transsexual) who are going through a lot of the same things you are.

You might even get a date. It's been known to happen.

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