The Top Ten Reasons why you might suspect that you've been
watching The Lion King too much:
by Samuel Simpson


You seriously contemplate buying a laserdisc player and a
Dolby surround sound rig just so you can watch The Lion King
on it.

You lie awake nights wondering who Nala's father is.

You feel strangely compelled to build a model of Pride Rock
out of mashed potatoes.

Your place of residence looks more like the Disney store
than the Disney store does.

You can proudly boast that you have each and every one of
the 126,720 individual frames of the movie available in JPEG
format on your Lion King web page.

The neighbors complain about you climbing up on your roof at
dawn and holding your cat in the air.

You wonder if "The Brightest Star" and "Far From the Pride
Lands" are canon.

You tell your friends that from now on they should address
you as "sire" or "your majesty."

Let's face it.  Human females (or males) just don't hold the
same attraction for you any more.

There's a bunch of white-coated men with nets after you.
They want to take you back - to the local zoo!