Subject: Rafiki-- Master of the spirit world! Date: Sat, 26 Sep 1998 17:47:57 -0500 From: Rindimo Reply-To: TLK-L@lionking.org Organization: L.O.S.T.--C.A.U.S.E. To: TLK Mailing List And the Answer to Chris Boyce's question of long ago is as follows: Rafiki-- Master of the Spirit World By: Rindimo Cheetah-- master of delays It was a glorious sunny day for the old baboon. There were no broken bones, astranged diseases, or hypochondriacs insistng that they were near death with some illness. Rafiki gave a deep, liberating sigh, as he lay on the grassy knoll overlooking a generous portion of the pridelands, all the while chewing on a blade of grass. Just out of the pure joy of the moment, he began to doze off as he closed his eyes, and started humming an old lullaby that he had always carried with a sentimental comfort in it's melody. Then it came from the sky, and hit him in the head. "DOOF! OWWADAT!?" The Shamaan shouted in an almost incoherent ramble of surprise. He then looked at the object that hit him in the head, and grimaced. It was a flat board, that was bendable in the middle, with a whole bunch of red and black squares on it. "Checkers? AGAIN???!!??" He looked up into the heavens to see all the little coin-shaped playing pieces begin to rain down onto him, and the board. Each fell into it's respective place on the board-- ready for yet again, another challenging game with the Prideland's champion. "Mufasa! Couldn't jyou realise dat I was taking a nice nap for once!???" Oblivious to what the primate said, one of the black checkers moved. Reluctantly, the old ape sighed, and proceeded to go along with one of the great kings of the past. "Great big baby of the past," he thought to himself. As usual, Rafiki won-- due to his experience being far greater than that of post mortem Mufasa. And, as usual, the spirit of Mufasa threw the board up in the air in frustration, scattering the pieces all over the place. "Bah! Now calm down, Mufasa! Jyou knew you were in for it when jyou challenged me! Really, jyou big baby! Bah! Stop it! Sore looser!" Rafiki was being pelted with assorted pieces of the checkerboard. "Why jyou-- How DARE you call me dat!" He shouted. "If anyone's an old fart, it's JYOU!!" Rafiki began throwing pieces of the checkers game back at Mufasa. "Hah! I got jyou!" Suddenly, the board, and all the playing pieces-- save for the one in Rafiki's hand-- flew back up into the heavens. Rafiki sensed something was wrong, and as he turned around, he could see simba running up the hill to greet him. "Rafiki!" he shouted, "What was all of THAT!? I heard shouting, and saw something floating away from you while I was patrolling my kingdom. Are you all right?" "I'm okay. Eet was... um... a bird! Yes! A very annoying bird dat just flew off, dat's all." Promptly, a lone checker piece hit Rafiki on the head. "JOWWWWW!" "WHat was that!!??" Simba screamed, as he eyed the strange object that fell from the heavens, "Is that some sort of bird droppings?" "Yeah, a BIG Dodo-- OUCH!" Rafiki was pelted again. "Is their something you haven't told me, Rafiki?" Simba eyed the baboon with a look of distrust. Rafiki sighed. "Okay, eef you must know, I'll tell jyou." Simba happily jumped into Rafiki's lap. "YAY! STORY TIME!!" "OOF! Get off! GET OFFFFF!! Jyou aren't a cub enny more-- jyou're just as bad as jyou fahdder! EEEEYOUCH!!" Rafiki was pelted yet again. "Well, jyou ARE! you big baby! Hey! I heard dat!" Simba stared at Rafiki. "My father was here?" "IS." Rafiki begrudgingly admitted. "How come I can't see, or hear him?" "Hmmph! Well! If jyou'd let me tell my story, jyou'd all reddy have dee answer by now!" "Oh. Oops!" "EEt all started when sum friends invited me to play a Dungeons and Dragons game...." Rafiki went into great detail about the experimental drugs, weegee boards, and other mystical, magical things that he was drawn into, and how he became an annoyance to the spirit world, until they finally decided to use him as one of their communicators. First, he was nothing more than an intermediate communicator-- He relayed messages to spirits that wouldn't talk to eachother face-to-face, due to a recent argument the two had, or something along those lines... Then he was a gopher. He'd go for this, go for that... Pretty much whatever they wanted him to do on a whim... Finally though, Finally, he was able to attend the fancy parties, and conventions that were held every now and again-- After all, the spirits realized that he would be joining them soon enough... He was no longer a servant... he was a good friend with a lot of dead guys that owed him favors. So now he could do whatever he wanted, and use his awesome communication abilities for whatever he pleased. He even got cheap long distance rates.... "WOW!" Simba exclaimed. "So it was really you that summoned my father?" "Of course eet was. He wouldn't be able to say hello, even eef he knew how! OUCH!" "DAD!" Simba shouted, "You're embarrassing me!" "Oh. Sorry, son... I guess I'll go see what the bowling league is doing, then..." "Tank God." Rafiki mumbled underneath his breath. "Well, Rafiki, that was quite an interesting story! I have a new respect for you, now!" Simba looked the Shamaan in the eyes, and growled. "Just stay away from the kids, you hear!?" "Hmmp! Fine, be dat way! I suppose you shouldn't have a Shamaan to heal your daughter from that Kissing disease, eh?" "Oh, allright. You win. Well, I guess I was acting silly. That was still a great-- and interesting-- story, Rafiki!" "Tanks." "Where!? WHere!?" "NO NO NO!!! Not jyou too!! I meant 'tanks' as in tank you, not tanks as in 'boom boom!'" "Oh." Simba chuckled, as he big Rafiki farewell, and walked off. Finally, Rafiki laid back down on the grass, and began to doze off as the sun slowly dissapeared over the horizon. Yes, everybody was satisfied, and left him alone at long last. That is... until the Monopoly board came his way... The End. :) -Rindimo Cheetah (rindimo@bellsouth.net) +Founder, and only member of L.O.S.T.-- C.A.U.S.E (League Of Simplistic Technology-- Creating All Unforeseen Solutions Evident) +FCOS Lost & Found Clerk ICQ # : 12915153 +Amateur Artist/Writer/Musician AOL IM : Rindimo1 +Bachelor <=( Webpage: http://www.geocities.com/soho/museum/9957/ ********************************************************************* Well don't stop. Whatever you do, don't stop. Because as soon as you stop, you're forgotten. - Mageuzi *********************************************************************