ALL these charcters are © and belong to Disney

Some of this may be rascist.










(Timon walks on to the stage waving to everyone as he goes by)


Timon: So welcome to the TLK comedian stadium located in no place in particular, yes your only reading a sheet of paper. You know, me and Pumbaa are going to be the stars of the next The Lion King. *cough* Excuse me, Pumbaa and I…..*mumbles under breath* why are they even making this thing, didn’t they see that they ruined TARZAN! I mean, hmmm let’s tell the stories that are already on the tv series, SYC! Lets tell a story of something even dumber. *sits at a near desk* You know, *pops a sucker in his mouth* maybe I should go dangle Micheal Jackson over Disney studios, give them a piece of what I think. Disney, really is a great place but…*shrugs* Anyhow, our guests today are………….



SIMBA!!!!!! *claps*


PRINCE KOVU!!!!!!!!!!!


KIARA!!!!!!!!! *claps*





Timon: Yes they will be here shortly, for the time being..our TLK band consisting of SCAR! *claps* and the rest of the outlanders.


*band plays*


Scar: Thank you for that wonderful welcoming timon.


Timon: And your welcome. Latest news, Simba has been cloned but Rafiki claims he dropped him at the ceremony off pride rock and that is why we have not seen him yet. Also in the news, Adsoboe Ben Tiger has not yet made an opening for Come See Me…play of the year near Africa. No more interesting stuff except for…raging adoulscent lion was caught spanking her cub over and over again for trying to roar at a nearby Ashcrafts worker/cheetah. Yes, he is their mascot.


Scar: Um…did you know that we’re playing the Wartog Rapsody in the next movie.


Timon: Yeah uncle, I’m in the fing movie. Next…our top ten list.


*band plays*


Timon: Ok…top ten list tonight is..”Why The Lion Does Not Sleep Tonight” ten here we go…


#10. He was told Adsoboe Ben Tiger doesn’t know how to aim his big missiles


#9. The finding of gas


#8. He found out that with horses the male stands behind to guard, he felt jealous so now he stays up all night


#7. He is still wondering why Nala’s eyes have suddenly turned blue


#6. He thinks he knows, but lions don’t wear contacts.


#5. Lionesses don’t either


#4. He’s taking Simba’s role and over protecting his daughter that is blind, he feels she may be raped


#3. He doesn’t want his pride to be dangled over a garbage can.


#2. He can’t wait to be king


#1. He took an over-dosage of  pain relievers




Timon: Now introducing Simba!


*Simba walks in and waves and blows kisses to the audience*


Simba: Hello everybody..


*he takes a seat next to Timon’s desk*


Timon: Hey there Simba.




Simba: Hey…